Overcoming Obstacles

Get Started Building Your Own Home

The number of people who want to own a tiny house, compared to the number of people who actually own (or are in the process of building) a tiny house, is quite small. I would venture to say that of the people who both want to and “could” live a simpler life in a tiny house (the life situation could allow for it), versus the people who actually do it, is about 1%, if that.

Compared to standard large home- ownership stats, that is, well… TINY!

So why do some people actually enjoy their tiny house dreams, while so many do not? And what can you do to actually become a tiny house owner? What is the root of the problem? Let’s explore it.

Most people would tell you to take action. I don’t disagree. I tend to always take action quickly and decisively, and most people would serve themselves well by learning to be more decisive, and then jump. When I stumbled onto tiny houses, I did a little bit of research, but I very quickly took action to put down a deposit on a trailer, which I knew would get me committed to the project. 

But taking action isn’t my advice in this article. Dealing with your fear and coming into alignment with your vision is what you should focus on if you really do want to be a tiny houser. Your fears and worries, though quite real to you, are actually more like a “house of cards”. And you’re the only one who can dispel the fears by moving through them. And that involves personal growth, and alignment. 

Are you surprised to read that the single most powerful thing you can “do” to move from the “dreamed about it” to the “did it” category, is personal/spiritual growth? Don’t be – a lack of spiritual or personal growth is what keeps all of us from attaining all of our desires.

When I made the decision to become a tiny houser, I really made the commitment. That means I committed to letting my attainment of the vision outshine my fears and concerns about the millions of things that could possibly go wrong. When you fully commit internally, you still have fears, they just don’t win the fight. I spent a lot of time thinking about, and feeling my way into what it would be like to own and live in a tiny house. I let my imagination lead the way, and you should too. 

That gave me the courage to look to my local community for support and assistance. One of my first actions (once I committed) was to jump on Meetup.com and look for a local Meetup group about tiny housing or alternative building techniques. There was none in Boise at the time. Instead of lamenting that fact, and let is slow me down or stop me in my tracks, I just decided to create one. I asked Macy Miller to join me in that effort, and just four months later, we have nearly well over 100 people in the Boise area who are registered members of the Meetup group, and it’s growing quickly. That support network didn’t exist until a couple of people had a vision to make something real. Now it exists. In the same way, when you have a strong vision, it will become real. A strong vision has a way of turning fears into mere concerns. And all concerns can be addressed through some planning, research, and a healthy dose of “go with the flow”.

True I took action on both the trailer and the Meetup group, but it’s a certain comfort level with dealing with change, or the unknown, that allowed me to take action in the first place. And as a business coach, that is a common thread I see between people who are successful, and those who stay perpetually in the “someday” category. It’s a willingness to step into the unknown. And the stronger your vision, the stronger your desire, the weaker the obstacles become.

In organizing the Meetup group, I’ve had a lot of conversations with people about in what stage they are in, relative to starting their TH project. And I hear some common themes — reasons why many people are still in the “perpetual dreaming” stage:

1. Not sure where they will park the house. This not knowing really seems to freak people out!
2. The quasi-legal status of TH’s, which plays back into #1. People fear the idea of putting time and effort into a project only to have it be thwarted by local authorities. Moving seems like a hassle.
3. No money for it, unemployment, or both.
4. On disability, or being physically impaired, or having zero building skills. 

These all seem like big, scary reasons to the people who express them, but I am going to (lovingly) “call BS” on all of these reasons! 

Why? Because all of them are excuses, not valid reasons. Now, before you grab your pitchfork, light the torches and assemble the mob, let me explain… 

Yes, at first glance, these are challenges. No doubt about that! But a challenge, and a reason to not do something, are two very different things. 

Just because a challenge exists, doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t do something. It just means you have some fears to face, and some “logistics” to coordinate In fact, the fact that the challenge exists is a great reasons why it SHOULD be done! 

• It’s possible that your house turns out looking crappy. That’s fine. Your house can be fixed or improved over time.  
• It’s possible that you discover tiny house living isn’t right for you. That’s OK. There’s only one way to find out. No one is expecting you to commit for life.
• You might have to move your tiny house several times. Not a big deal, just go with the flow and assume the new locations will be even better!
• You might have to deal with the disapproval of others. That’s OK, it’s an opportunity to stand strong in your knowing and claim your identity and lifestyle.
• You might screw up big-time!! That’s OK too. You will screw up – we all do! It’s called being human. 

Let’s get real. Yes…

The fact of the matter is that in your journey to build and live in a tiny house, you WILL screw up. You WILL make mistakes. No one does it flawlessly. No one doesn’t get hit with unpleasant surprises. 

You will feel frustration and disappointment along the way. So accept that now, and do it anyway! Give yourself permission to be human. Life is about the process, the journey, not the destination, so get your journey started TODAY.

If you have a disability or limited mobility, or a challenge like that, then ask the Universe, or God (or whatever Source/Force you align with), to send you help. You don’t have to do the labor yourself, you can supervise. You can hire. You can find “workarounds” and help in places you never expected to find it in, but it requires commitment and courage.

Start with “Baby Steps”

Can you start something “big” without knowing all of the details of how it will come together? Can you do it “on a wing and a prayer”? Or do you need to know all the details of where the time, energy, materials, money, knowledge, etc. are going to come from, before you start? 

If you lean towards the later, then I would challenge you to ask yourself why? And what can you do to exercise your “faith” muscle? The majority of Westerners claim to be people of “faith”. If that sounds like you, then test your faith by being willing to move into the discomfort of uncertainty. Fear of the unknown is normal. Feel that fear, and move forward anyway, decisively, today!

Let’s dig a little deeper.

You may have heard the expression that “life begins outside of your comfort zone” and that is very true. Comfort zones are never static, over time, they shrink or contract. If you don’t continually push your boundaries and consciously expand your comfort zone by leaning into your fears, it will shrink and shrink a little more every day, until you are comfortable in very few situations. 

Building a tiny house is a fantastic experiment in blowing your comfort zone wide open!

All of the fears and concerns listed above are rooted in either fear of the unknown, ignorance of your own power as creative, spiritual beings, or a mindset that is closed to higher possibilities. 

Simply put: you do not need to have all the answers before you start a project. Just like driving at night, you can’t see your entire journey from start to finish. You can only see as far as your headlights shine. But you know the road and route exists, and you’ll get there eventually with the help of your headlights. As you get further down the road, the next steps become clear. Same thing with tiny houses: the route exists, so you only need to see the next step. Don’t let a fear of not having all of the answers stop you from moving forward.

If you fear the quasi-legality of a trailer, then you’re feeling a lack of belief that the Universe can provide the right situation for you in which you are left to live your life in peace. Where the neighbors

are cool, relaxed, and welcoming. Where government officials don’t tread. 

The fact is that within almost any community, there are plenty of little “pockets of paradise” where you home could nestle safely without legal problems.

If you are forced to move – so what!? Then move, find a new place. Eventually you’ll find the perfect situation. Go with the flow. Trust…

Don’t have any money? Instead of saying or thinking “I don’t have the money”, instead, ask the Universe “HOW can I get the money?” 

Even if you get no answers right away, by asking an open ended question that leaves the door open to any of thousands of possibilities, answers will find you. Seek and ye shall find. Knock and it shall be opened. 

The fact is that you create your own abundance, whether you realize it or not. So ask better questions. Ask questions that allow for the answer you want. How can I earn it? Who can assist? What grants might be available? What potential donors live in my town? How can I earn extra income? How can I lower my expenses right now to save some cash? How can rearrange my debts to reduce monthly expenses? Who can I ask for guidance? These are all open ended questions that open the door to greater financial prosperity, so start asking them. 

You see, any reason that you put out as a reason to NOT begin your journey is just that – a reason. It’s not right, nor is it wrong, but it will remain an obstacle. But when you start actively looking for ways around that obstacle, acting with courage, and faith, then answers will start appearing. Resources become available. Help will show up. 

When I put a deposit on my trailer, I didn’t have the cash for the whole house, and I still don’t. I didn’t know what design or plan I would go with, or where I would park it, or know what my plumbing system will be. And I still don’t have many of these answers. But I do have a very well framed house, sheathed, and nearly roofed, sitting just a few feet away as I type this. And I know that I still don’t have many of the answers today, but I trust they will come. And that is the basic message of this article: TRUST that the answers WILL COME. Don’t wait for them. Just start!

Right now, here are some things you can search for answers for where the money will come from to hire the laborers to build your house. You can also:

• Begin your search for sponsors to contribute cash, materials or labor, etc..
• Create a mission statement for your home
• Create an illustration for your home
• Buy the door knocker, or the street number sign, or the mailbox. Get something symbolic.
• Drive around for a spot to park it. Start knocking on doors. Ask people if you can park it on their lot. Yes, it takes guts.Yes, you’ll have to deal with rejection. So? 

Determine the very next step, and commit to taking that step.

So many people walk by my tiny house construction zone, and say “I want one of those” or “someday maybe I will build one too“, and despite my hopes for them to actually do it, I know most of them will never do it. And I want to say to them “don’t hope, or dream, just do it“. Start. And don’t stop until it’s done. 

Nothing is Permanent, So Relax!

One final note: please don’t view a tiny house as the final answer to the questions “where and how shall I live the rest of my life?” 

NO SITUATION is likely to be the final answer for the remainder of your days. So in that sense, every housing situation is temporary. That could be three months, or it could be thirty years. And because it’s temporary, if you screw it up, it’s not a big deal, you just go with the flow, one day at a time.

But when you view it as “do or die” or as “permanent, so no room for errors” then you are

poisoning the entire situation with heavy, fear-based energy. Just look at the whole tiny house thing as a temporary project, an exploration of one of many possible lifestyles. If it doesn’t suit you, then just start dreaming again, plan a new situation, and start on that dream! Release yourself from the need to get everything right, forevermore. 

Release the need to see all of the dots fully connected.

Just take it one day at a time.

And most of all have FAITH, and demonstrate that faith, by courageously taking action today!

Written By Ryan Harris for Tiny House Magazine Issue 19